VH1 dating shows are like the regular season in professional sports – it’s one big long road that leads to the post-season where everybody brings their A-game. The post-season is the reunion show, the big payoff where scores are settled, careers are made (or washed away), and champions are crowned forever.

Girls are ranked on their overall performance during the regular season with extra emphasis on what they bought to the table at the reunion show. Percentage points are based on the same scale The Flavor of Love season one was based on, when I gave New York a 100% chance of getting her own show, which actually happened.

Destiney…was pretty hard to watch during the season. She was loud and annoying and rarely had anything interesting to say. Even worse, she didn’t say anything uninteresting in an entertaining way (New York pulled off being uninteresting in an interesting way and got her own gig). Destiney’s stock definitely went up on the reunion show – she became a human being and stopped screaming. If she doesn’t get her own show, we’ll definitely see her in the next season of Rock of Love or Best Week Ever.
Spin-off Shot: 90%
- Fulfill her/the/this Destiney (current model of dating show, insert Destiney)
- Groupie Discount (how-to-be-a-groupie type competition)

Angelique…took her stage time and did the most with it. She showed people her butt, did a lot of mumbling, and picked a fight with someone, showing she is capable of pushing an entire series herself, or at least appearing on a new version of Charm School.
Spin-off Shot: 75%
- Lost in Translation (she speaks French the whole series, nobody else does)
- French Kissing (current model of dating show, insert Angelique)

Daisy…carried most of the season with her breakdowns, lies, and chest – it’s not enough to be a franchise player though. Heather’s fight with her at the reunion pushed Daisy’s stock down a little bit – she needed this last show to do something crazy and she let Heather (who was out hunting for her own show) take her down a few notches.
Spin-off Shot: 45%

Peyton…blew her chances with her Rock of Love song. The set was absolutely gorgeous, though (am I right guys?).
Spin-off Shot: 0%

Kristy Joe…has the best ready-for-tv story, as she’s been through several divorces. Put her in a house with a bunch of freshly divorced guys (and you don’t have to tell her the hook for a Joe Millionaire-type spin.) and bang, we’re off!
Spin-off Shot: 78%

Aubrey…only chance she has is if Kristy Joe scores a show, opening the door for a boring sidekick.

Heather… went all out for her first reunion show (and scored return appearance on this past season/reunion show for her efforts). She does crazy party things like say “woo” a lot and she lets us know (often) that she is straight up and cool with it. I don’t think she has the power to drive an entire series, though, although her appearing on future Rock of Love’s is inevitable. She’s destined to be reality televisions Scottie Pippen.
Spin-off Shot: 40%

Coming soon: Flavor of Love 3 Spin-Off Odds!

It’s over and it was…okay. It’s hard to beat hardcore discussions about the creative backstage end of professional wrestling - I can do that all night. As far as the actual booking is concerned though, I’m torn. A part of me was getting wrapped up in how I used to feel during Wrestlemania while another part of me was tired and bored with the current stale product.

The opening match was solid while the Money in the Bank match was very well done but had a questionable ending. (CM Punk, really? I’m tired of having ECW forced down my throat) Kane beating Chavo for the ECW Heavyweight Title in under 9 seconds was good, but only because we didn’t have to watch the match. If turning the only official ECW match at Wrestlemania into a squash isn’t any indication of what the WWE thinks of the brand, then what is?

Batista and Umaga was alright on paper, but a little boring to watch. Why put on this garbage when there wasn’t a tag-team, United States, or Intercontinental Championship on the card? Even wrestling’s annual main event isn’t going to showcase these titles, then why should we care? Mr. Perfect rolls in his grave, Bret Hart rolls his eyes, and Roddy Pipper rolls Vince McMahon’s house.

I seriously fast forwarded through the women’s match.

Randy Orton retaining was good booking, but the match itself was blah and the ending was too unexpected. I think I was reading a text message from someone I don’t even like communicating with when Randy Orton scored the pin. Big Show and Mayweather was entertaining and I was relieved when it wasn’t given final match treatment.

I’m pissed that the Undertaker beat Edge - he’s old and boring. Edge is young and entertaining. Undertaker should retire soon. Edge should be wrestling for a long time. I wouldn’t mind hanging out with Edge, watching a movie or playing frisbee. I’m going to make excuses if the Undertaker invites me over to his house.

Ric Flair vs. Shawn Michaels was scripted pretty close to perfection. (Non-wrestling fans, poke fun all you want at the next sentence and consider my comeback of “You just don’t get it” as extremely brutal.) I was very pleased when HBK mouthed “I’m sorry” and “I love you” before super-kicking Flair in the jaw. It was a classy ending, and the only thing that bugged me about it was that it wasn’t the main event of the night. Ric Flair has shown a downright insane crazy level of commitment to doing what he loves to do. It should have gotten top-billing, no question about it.

I’m going to watch RAW tomorrow - I want to see how much time they spend on rehashing the story lines from tonight. I want to see how many new feuds are born. I want to see if they truly move on from Wrestlemania 24 and start building towards Wrestlemania 25, where I’ve decided that even if I don’t a watch single second of WWE between now and April 2009, I’ll still buy a ticket and find a ride to Houston. Me = sucker.

The sun rises and it’s time to survive!

Show Notes

John and Cirie are still fighting over some alliance breakup blah blah and some backstab nonsense. I don’t really understand what this has to do with being a survivor so I fast forward through this segment as well as the opening segment. I watch the cute commercial about that new Red Lobster restaurant.

When I come back, I watch fans catch a water-snake, Chet take a bath in the ocean and a giant turtle swim. Pretty exciting so far.

On the other side, Eliza is feeling sick, which is good for television. Everyone else talks about how worthless she is and how they should have voted her out the night before while she is sitting right in front of them.

Cut to Jeff Probst who is looking HOT!!!.

Reward Challenge

Jump in water, swim underneath, grab some rocks, put the rocks in something, and then unscramble the letters on the rocks to say a word. The winners get three pet chickens to love and make friends with.

Post challenge Ozzie and Kathleen are sent to Exile Island. Ozzie tricks Kathleen into doing work while he goes searching for the hidden immunity idol. Kathleen tricks Ozzie into thinking she’s doing work and takes a nap. Ozzie finds the idol and then makes a trick one to put in the place of the old one. Ozzie’s friends back home say something like “Ozzie’s crazy, he made a trick idol and put it in place of the real one.”

Immunity Challenge

Unlock something, lock something, get out of it, maneuver around something, and (surprise!) solve a puzzle.

Tribal Council

Mikey B. gets stabbed in the dadgum back by obviously-in-charge firefighter Joel. Next week the tribes mix it up!